At 3 AM thoughts

I love to tell stories. A lot. It mostly comes about myself.

And I do love to listen to other stories too, as much as they love to hear mine. I love reveals things beneath people's mind and talk about them. Talk about how do they felt about it, how do they cope with it.

But lately, I don't feel like I'm doing it as much as I like it back then again. I was kind of thinking so much stuffs like:

Should I do this?

What if people don't like it?

 What if they think I am a...

So many "what ifs". So many things that hold me back.

I know this certain thing happens sometimes in life: there is someone who stops you from doing things. Or, someone who has said something that makes you stopped from doing things.

You might say that I should walk away and go on. Do not listen to it. Well, I did.

It took me my whole self to have the courage to do it because it involved a decade years old friendship. But then, why is it matter?

I tell you two things:

First, if someone came to you to tell you their problems, do not go away. They already had a hard day and came to a point where she has to share her mind with someone. And she chooses you.

From among a bunch of friends, she trusted you. She expected some reliefs words from you.

Second, all you need is a pair of ears which all of us have. It's not that hard so please make time for her. Being listened to by someone we trusted is comforting.

As written in The School of Life:
"When we're in the company of people who listen well, we experience a very powerful pleasure, but too often we don't really realize what it is about what this person is doing that is so welcome"--page 112
Third, no matter how hard she was about to survive, she won't consider herself a strong person. Just, believe me, when someone feeling weak, don't shower her with "you are strong" stuff. Because no, at that time they won't feel like they're strong.

Tell her that you understand how hard it is for her and you are there for her.

Last, no matter how illogical, irrational, or maybe melancholic she is, just do not judge her the time she wants you to listen to her. You can give opinions if she needs help to fix it, later.

I will put this under "L" files: lesson learned. In the name of friendship, I won't judge my friend for being stupid or in a wrong decision she made before. Even though I know I am a horrible friend, I won't push her away the time she needs me.

Anyway, do you realize that I said four things instead of two? Thanks for reading by the way (if there's any). It's been a hard time for me to writing this down after months. I'm glad it's getting off of my chest after all.[]